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Girl:
I see.
I feel.
I walk.
I lived.
This layout is done by
Flamboyance.
Code references from
Missyan.
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restless is the word.i think tt's wat long term unemployment does to the mind. n when i do find work, i find myself too lazy to turn up.wenta c my ah-soose again today n m still in love with it, though i wld gladly exchange it for a hk trip like the fool or even a KL trip. cancelled plans for KL aft my 19 year-old colleague had an accident since i no longer had the guts to sit in it.speaking of which, have been adding alot of blogs to my "favourites" though i barely knew half of them in the understanding kind.of cos outta the thousands of links i click over the past few days/weeks, i've chanced upon their blogs. there was a period of time i struggled over if i shld write it in here n it's implications.today is D-DAY: decision day.i figured it wouldn't n shouldn't have tt great an impact aft such long elusion. furthermore, i reckoned i'll b the same level shld i continue the silence.wateva the case, i m as un-interested as with red swastica girl. so, no worries.adding to the cream, i m totally looking forward to sch cos hols has never been this boring. the enthusiasm even masked the fact tt red swastica girl is coming. with abit of luck, she'll prob join me with foolish' silly fren.speaking of the massive blogs i've been reading, there's a particular Cherry whose demeanour is wat i hope to achieve. i feel empowered everytime i read her blog. though she seldom update~then there's this group of guys whose blogs i read too.a common trait i found among guys this days is tt they r steering away from the stereotypes.they get emo attacks as frequent as us, tgt with bad hair days.they worry abt zits n blemishes n worries abt the scents they use.they have no qualms abt crying or even eating humble pies to cheer their gfs.just a few characteristics. of cos i knew they existed somewhere in herds but i never knew they get mood swings THAT often.for instance, celebrating a shared journey home with someone u c everyday just seems a tad weird to me.mayb i still prefer chauvinist stereotypes.mayb i take longer than the rest to get accustomed to new things.the only thing to pop champange is tt they seem to make better pals n confidantes.DON'T READthere have been many things i dun seem to c eye to eye recently but m struggling between nagging n keeping mum, like a rocking see-saw. resulting in a rise in frequency of "bitching" which i seriously did not intend to do. n then there r ways this world works n minds tt turns in more complex routes than i can comprehend. my simple mind just can't seem to figure out n hope to find a soln withing the vast replies i get. this is not wat i want nor wish for, it makes me forget who i m n wat i m made of. sometimes i feel so guilty i can't slp but i can't seem to bottle it up within.when friendly isn't friendly or happy isn't easy, or when tt nice is not equals nice, or the naive believe tt there's no reason to b jealous of someone's who attached but u r already on the receiving end of the "slow-torture" treatment.somehow i just can't comprehend tt kinda mentality.i need a daphne, or a KT, or a KL, or an ivy, or a catherine, or a xavier (the role n nt the character), or a zhang qian, or a bryan (lee, ng or otherwise), a kian beng, a yong kang, a shawn or....or...or....mayb all i need is a climb on the mountains.mayb a prac lesson is all i need.but i dun do close.(asking ppl nt to read will only increase its readership.)
♥ 1:41 AM